Narcissist Abuse
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10 Things A Narcissist Does Not Want You To Know
A narcissist is the embodiment of Satan personified in human form. They are master manipulators who will do anything to keep their facade under wraps. They are demonic spirits who must inhabit flesh in order to carry out the wiles & schemes of their father – Satan.
You see flesh. You may see a nice looking person. Inside they are ravenous wolves, seeking whom they may devour.
Narcissists appear confident on the outside. However, on the inside, they are insecure children who have chosen to operate in agreement with their false self.
They appear strong or like bullies but inside they are cowards who turn to demons & a demonic mindset to verbalize their true feelings.
They appear charming and sweet on the outside. As if they would do anything for you. But everything comes with strings attached; they desire your attention, compliments, and you buying into their image to survive.
Narcissists gaslight, project, hoover, use smear campaigns, pathologically lie, & give the silent treatment to control to inflict emotional abuse on their victims.
Watch the video to hear ten things a narcissist does not want you to know.
What would you add to this list?
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Bri: A Domestic Abuse Survivor’s Story
Listen here: https://www.spreaker.com/user/12992213/10-21-20-bris-story-with-shannon-savoy
As part of National Domestic Violence Awareness Month, Narc Free Living is giving survivors a platform to share their stories. Listen to a beautiful young ladies’ story of how she found herself in a domestic abuse & a narcissistic marriage – and what she is doing today to overcome.
Bri, thank you for sharing this deeply personal story. It is never easy for a survivor to come forward. Thank you for being obedient to God’s instruction. It is our prayer that this message, your story, goes far by the grace of God. We pray for continued healing through Yeshua and that Yahweh continues to get the glory in your story. We pray that sharing your story helps someone understand that abuse and love do not coexist. If it helps just one person understand they can make it out, sharing your story is not in vain.
How does abuse start?
What are the signs?
Can you recognize the red flags?
Do you know the tactics of abusers?
Listen to join the discussion.
“Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” Ephesians 5:25
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We are our brothers & sisters keepers!
Proceeds help us to give back to survivors of domestic abuse and support our outreach programs. Stay tuned! We’ll be updating how donations and proceeds help support our less fortunate brethren, as well as, those going through a particularly hard time in their lives.
“If there be among you a poor man of one of thy brethren within any of thy gates in thy land which the LORD thy God giveth thee, thou shalt not harden thine heart, nor shut thine hand from thy poor brother.” Deuteronomy Chapter 15:7
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Domestic Violence in Childhood: A Survivor’s Story
As part of National Domestic Violence Awareness Month, Narc Free Living is giving survivors a platform to share their stories.
Listen here! https://www.spreaker.com/user/12992213/moremi-radio-broadcast-10-07-2020-shanno
The broadcast aired live on Dr. Moremi’s Radio Show on Big Gospel Xpress WBGX Chicago 1570 AM.
A Survivor’s Story
The story read is from a young man who has the courage and the strength to share his story. He witnessed his mother physically and psychologically abused at the hands of his father. The abuse affected him throughout his life in many ways, until he awakened to the fact that there was a better way to live.
What is domestic violence?
Domestic violence is most commonly thought of as intimate partner violence, but can also include violence or abuse from a family member.
The term “intimate partner violence” includes the following acts as inflicted or caused by a current or former intimate partner: it is not limited to physical abuse!
- Actual or threats of physical violence
- Actual or threats of sexual violence
- Emotional or psychological abuse (e.g., verbal abuse, constant arguing, cheating, neglecting emotional needs, name-calling, or putdowns)
- Stalking (e.g., excessive calls/texts/emails, monitoring daily activities, using technology to track a person’s location)
- Financial abuse (e.g., withholding money, stealing from, ruining credit, stopping a partner from getting or keeping a job)
Domestic violence includes emotional abuse. It is NOT only physical abuse. Abuse is damaging pathologically, psychologically, and physiologically. It damages those who experience it firsthand AND those who bear witness to the abuse.
Abuse changes you.
Children who witness abuse are survivors too.
To this young man, THANK YOU. Thank you for having the courage, to tell the truth, and to share your experience. We hope others understand the impacts of witnessing, hearing, or knowing that your parent or loved one is abused has on profound effects on children, in particular. Children need security. Abuse in ANY FORM includes incessant arguing – a form of emotional abuse. A volatile home threatens a child’s sense of security and alters their life’s path. Recovery is possible!
Men need safe spaces too.
Many have been abused sexually, emotionally, psychologically, physically, and will never release that account. It is buried too deep. The shame and guilt of abuse are not yours to bear. I pray that you find a licensed therapist to help you unpack what happened to you. There is healing in transparency and allowing God to heal you from the inside out. You are not the person that you have the potential to become as long as you live in silence & secrecy.
Abuse is debilitating to all involved.
I pray that those in abusive situations understand that staying in a two-parent home, “for the sake of the children”, that is abusive will impact your child/children in ways that you cannot begin to understand. Turn to God and ask Him for a way of escape. You do not deserve the abuse and your children do not deserve their parent being abused. God does not want anyone abused. That is not God’s plan for your life. Trust in Him to be your provider. He IS Jehovah Jireh.
If you are an abuser, albeit emotionally, verbally, spiritually, sexually, financially, psychologically – MAN or WOMAN – turn from your wicked ways. Abusers and narcissists may fool everyone around them, but they cannot fool God. He will not be mocked. Those who turn a blind eye and enable abusers will be held accountable for their inaction as well.
Abusers are on a path to hell as they will not see the Kingdom of Heaven God unless you accept Jesus Christ. You must be born again. Ask God to come into your heart. Admit that you need His help to live righteously. Repent and turn from your evil ways. You may believe you are getting away with abuse, however, Jehovah God sees & knows ALL. He will judge accordingly. Repent and turn from evil.
Break the chains!
God’s Word on abuse.
1 Corinthians 6:9-10 Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind. Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God.
Ephesians 6:4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
Psalm 11:5 The Lord tests the righteous, but his soul hates the wicked and the one who loves violence.
Proverbs 22:10Drive out a scoffer and strife will go out, and quarreling and abuse will cease.
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Childhood Trauma : A Son’s Story of Survival
As part of National Domestic Violence Awareness Month, I want to kick off giving survivors a platform to share their stories.
The story that I read is from a young man who has the courage and the strength to share his story.
Go here to listen to the full story: https://www.facebook.com/551257378/videos/pcb.10157771877492379/10157771874412379/
Witnessing his mother abused affected him throughout his life in many ways – until he was awakened that there was a better way. Abuse has such damaging pathological, psychological, and physiological damaging effects on the abused and those who witness it. ABUSE CHANGES YOU. To this young man, THANK YOU. Thank you for having the courage, to tell the truth, and to share your experience. Others need to understand the impacts that witnessing, hearing, or knowing that your parent or loved one is being abused has on the children, in particular. Children need security. Abuse in ANY FORM, arguing, and a volatile home threatens their sense of security and alters their life’s path.
Men need safe spaces too. Many have been abused sexually, emotionally, psychologically, physically, and will never release that account. It is buried too deep. For situations like that, I pray that you find a licensed therapist to help you unpack what happened to you. You are not the person that you have the potential to become as long as you live in silence & secrecy. I pray that those in abusive situations – with or without children – understand that staying in a two-parent home that is abusive will impact your child/children in ways that you cannot begin to understand.
Turn to God and ask Him for a way of escape. You do not deserve the abuse and your children do not deserve their parent being abused. That is not God’s plan for your life. If you are an abuser, albeit emotionally, verbally, spiritually, sexually, financially, psychologically – MAN or WOMAN turn from your wicked ways. God will deal with you accordingly. You may believe you are getting away with abuse, however, Jehovah God sees & knows ALL. He will judge accordingly. Repent and turn from evil.
Ephesians 6:4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. Psalm 11:5 The Lord tests the righteous, but his soul hates the wicked and the one who loves violence. Proverbs 22:10 Drive out a scoffer, and strife will go out, and quarreling and abuse will cease.
Break the chains. #narcfreeliving
Photo Credit: Brian D’Cruz Hypno Plus
Past usage of the image can be seen in the records on Wayback Machine
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Shannon & LaRhonda Discuss Narcissistic Abuse
LaRhonda and Shannon take an in-depth look into narcissism from a spiritual perspective.
How does one become a narcissist?
Do narcissists abuse their children?
What are the signs of a narcissistic relationship?
Do narcissists know they are narcissists?
What does a narcissistic family look like?
Can narcissists change narcissists?
Does the forgiveness process as a Christ Follower mean that I must stay in contact with abusers or toxic family?
We have all encountered narcissists, whether we are aware of them or not.
Not all narcissists physically abuse but all abusers ARE narcissists.
Join the conversation today! We get real candid in this interview. You do not want to miss it!
Don’t forget to LIKE – don’t lurk! Join the discussion and leave a comment.
What was your experience with a narcissist?
Do you know the signs?
We do not have to be in relationships with demonic people. Narcissists embody the spirit of Satan through the spirit of Jezebel, Leviathan, and Python spirits. Get away from those who show they are operating in these spirits. You are not angry, or bitter for choosing to have No Contact with toxic and manipulative spirited people. Protect yourself. Narcissists are inherently evil and choose to be this way. Pray from a distance.
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Married To a Narcissist & How I Got Out
A Snippet of My Testimony
I have the pleasure of speaking on Dr. Moremi’s radio show “Taking A Look At Calvary” in Chicago on Big Gospel Express 1570 AM. We are on-air live from 10:30-11:00 AM CST on Wednesdays. Please tune in if you are in the Chicago area. I will upload the broadcast weekly here as well.
On last week’s show (September 23rd) I discussed how I found myself married to a narcissist. I also discuss how I left. Sharing my testimony is the perfect segway to National Domestic Violence Awareness Month which begins Oct 1. I want to inspire others to have faith and trust in God. Our faith is not in any man but in Jesus Christ. Domestic Violence affects all races, ethnicities, socio-economical, backgrounds, both men and women. It does absolutely does not discriminate.
Domestic Violence Statistics
Each year on average, nearly 20 people per minute are physically abused by an intimate partner in the United States. 1:3 women and 1:4 men will experience domestic abuse at some point in their lifetime. Those are very high statistics. During one year, this equates to more than 10 million women and men. Domestic violence is not limited to physical abuse. It is not limited to intimate partners. Parents abuse. Children abuse. Spouses abuse. Partners abuse. Coworkers abuse. Yes, so-called “pastors” and “Christians” abuse. Abuse comes in many forms and many sources. These are the numbers for the cases that are REPORTED. Many more go unreported.
Let’s Raise Awareness
Narc Free Living LLC is raising awareness to help bring an end to this debilitating and isolating form of abuse. We also strive to help others recognize all forms of abuse. We are more than conquerors through Christ!
We want to show our support for domestic violence survivors. Survivors should not bear the guilt & shame of abuse. When you are ready and able to, please feel free to share your testimony. Let’s help to change the narrative. (And if you are not ready, that it is totally ok:) There is no guilt, shame, or condemnation. Know that God does not want anyone abused, no matter who it is. Love and abuse do not coexist.
Feel free to share how you overcame abuse, left an abusive relationship, narcissistic family/friendship, and/or what steps you are taking to heal. Abuse is not something that we “just get over” or “forgive and let it go.” Healing is a deeply personal, lifelong journey. Forgiveness is one thing and healing is a whole other one. Just because someone forgives does not mean they have healed. Everyone’s story, recovery, healing processes are different. I will send a special gift to (at least) the first 10. (Gift is sent to those in the continental U.S.)
If you would like to share your story, please send them & I’ll share it on Narc Free Living LLC. (Names can be omitted if so desired.)
Send your info or story to:
Email: support@narcfreeliving.com
IG: https://www.instagram.com/narcfreelivingllc/
FB: https://m.facebook.com/narcfreelivingllc/
#breakthechains #narcfreeliving
God bless you!
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Take A Stand: Flying Monkeys & Enabling
Sometimes you just have to let people know where you stand. We stand on God’s Word. We stand on the side of survivors. We stand with & support survivors telling their stories so they can heal. We cannot heal from what we do not acknowledge.
Do not stand with narcissistic people, or flying monkeys, regardless if they are “family or friends”.
Do not stand with those that automatically take the side of an abuser with no regard for the truth.
Do not stand with those that play the middle because they are cowards & they fail to hold narcissists accountable for their actions or let them know when they are wrong.
Do not stand with those that enable, coddle, stand by, or turn a blind eye quietly while someone is abused. We do not play the middle man and we do not sit quietly without asking questions. Nope. Nada. Not here. Not ever. Not today and certainly not tomorrow.
“He that justifieth the wicked, and he that condemneth the just, even they both are abomination to the LORD.”
Proverbs 17:15 (KJV)
“Open thy mouth, judge righteously, and plead the cause of the poor and needy.”
Proverbs 31:9 KJV
“Blessed is he that considereth the poor (weak): the Lord will deliver him in time of trouble.”
Psalms 41:1 KJV
Learn to do good; seek justice, correct oppression; bring justice to the fatherless, and please the widow’s cause,” (Isaiah 1:17).
If you are enabling abuse, make no mistake, God will judge accordingly. Repent. Support survivors and do not enable abusers by proxy.
Break the chains of narcissist abuse!
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Do Not Stress About The Smear Campaign
Some people believe the narcissist’s pathological lies about you. The smear campaign, the lies about you being “crazy” – when in reality it is the narcissist who is insane due to the many demonic spirits dwelling on the inside of them. Jezebel & her henchmen spirits are actually running the show. The person who believes the narcissist does not understand the spirits behind the seemingly “nice” person that has everyone fooled. They cannot discern the spirits controlling the person.
What seemed like rejection was God’s protection against what is coming. Soon God will expose the lies told against you. He will make your enemies your footstool – make no mistake about it.
Listed below are examples of enablers and flying monkeys:
*They do not call or reach out to you when you are isolated by the narcissist.
*They reach out in defense of the narcissist.
*They reach out saying, “Oh just forgive & let it go”. LET THEM GO.
*They cozy up to the narcissist & fail to discern the spirit.
*They listen & entertain the lies told in the smear campaign.
*They do not show support.
Ahhh….but that’s not your problem anymore because no matter who believed you, regardless of who stood with you, or who did not – it is all by design. The fallout ALWAYS happens with a narcissist and you will lose people that you love. Pray from a distance.
Sometimes, we too can be misled by Jezebel, Ahab, or any other demonic spirits. When this happens make things right and apologize for your ignorance in the matter. Forgive yourself. The narcissist has a lifetime of perfecting their craft. The strongman spirits dwelling in them are strong, manipulative, & covert. Anyone can be fooled without the Holy Spirit. Do not allow the enemy to destroy a relationship that can be salvaged with communication, forgiveness, and accountability.
I repaired relationships where I was under Jezebel’s influence. At the time, I believed the enemy’s lies. When I began to discern the spirit and look at the patterns – not the words – God revealed the truth of who the person really was and what spirit they were operating under. I reached out and apologized to the other person to make things right. God will prepare hearts if the relationship is meant to be repaired. Likewise, if someone wants to believe the enemy’s lies and stay in the dark about who someone is – shake the dust off your feet and keep it moving. Jezebel reveals herself self sooner or later.
The good thing is now you discern through the power of the Holy Spirit who is who & where people stand. Sit back in peace, be obedient to His Word, and watch God work.
“The Lord said unto my Lord, Sit thou at my right hand until I make thine enemies thy footstool. The Lord shall send the rod of thy strength out of Zion: rule thou in the midst of thine enemies.” Psalms 110:1-2
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Let’s Examine The Spirit of Racism…
What is racism?
Racism is the prejudice, discrimination, or antagonism directed against a person or people on the basis of their membership of a particular racial or ethnic group, typically one that is a minority or marginalized.
● Racism is a spirit of division.
● We are called to love all people not just people who look like us.
We are dealing with spiritual warfare. Racism is demonic and when we participate in it, we are doing the devil’s work.
“But if you favor some people over others, you are committing a sin. You are guilty of breaking the law.” (James 2:9)
● What do racists and narcissists have in common?
Many racists are narcissistic in nature. Both put their own selfish desires before another’s well-being. Racists, like narcissists, are devoid of empathy and integrity when it comes to another race. Like narcissists do with their victims, racists do not empathize or see other races as human; they see them as subhuman. This allows them to do the things that they do with no remorse or conscience. Narcissists do not view their victims as human, they see them as resources, as a means to an end to get the narcissistic supply, money, or whatever else they need.
Racists are extremely narcissistic in nature as they kill, steal, and destroy to get power and stay in perceived power. Then they gaslight you to pretend as if your issues do not truly exist. They bait and switch and project by creating certain conditions and then labeling other races when they take their resources.
● Make no mistake those who operate in the spirit of racism will be judged. “The nations were filled with wrath, but now the time of your wrath has come. It is time to judge the dead and reward your servants the prophets, as well as your holy people, and all who fear your name, from the least to the greatest. It is time to destroy all who have caused destruction on the earth.” (Revelation 11:18)
UNTIL WE DEAL AND CAST OUT THE SPIRITS OF DIVISION AND RACISM, THESE DEMONIC INFLUENCES WILL CONTINUE TO INFILTRATE. We can march, protest, pass laws, etc., but the killings will still occur. Discrimination will still occur. Racism will still occur. Christ is the only way.
● Let’s examine racism in the spiritual realm:
We must examine the root and discern the fruit.
A racist in spiritual terms is one who hates the human race. God created the human race. Satan used race to divide.
Who is the ultimate racist? Satan. He hates ALL people equally. He uses his wiles and schemes to incite fighting and to create division amongst God’s creation. This way people hate one another. Satan uses the other races as Scapegoats.
“For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.” (Eph. 6:12).
Race supremacy is a principality of Satan. He simply uses racists to do his bidding. “These people are the ones who are creating divisions among you. They follow their natural instincts because they do not have God’s Spirit in them.” (Jude 1:19)
“If someone says, “I love God,” but hates a fellow believer, that person is a liar; for if we don’t love people we can see, how can we love God, whom we cannot see?” (1 John 4:20)
If you were taught to dislike a group of people because they are different or their skin color is not the same as yours, REPENT. Ask God to heal your heart.
● The church is meant to be a diverse body of people called by God from every tribe, tongue, and nation to be one in Christ. Yet, today’s church remains largely divided along ethnic lines. However, we seek to bridge this divide, we must not forget that it’s a fundamentally spiritual battle.
(Galatians 3:28-29) “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there is neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus.”
The battle against racism isn’t merely a fight against any individual, government, system, or law; it is a fight that confronts Satan and his demonic forces.
Satan attacks individuals and systems (Luke 22:31). He corrupts people and works through the unjust laws, practices, and traditions they create. He does this both through the governments & principalities of this world. He also does this through religious institutions that exalt pride, culture, and tradition over the truth of God’s Word.
“As a single group, Christ brought Jews and Gentiles back to God. He stopped them from hating each other. He did this by his death on the cross.” (Ephesians 2:16)
● How do we combat the spirits of racism (hate, pride, & fear)?
- Pray. Seek wisdom. Understand who is behind racism and
- Believers have inherited our heavenly Father’s nature.
- Walk in empathy & compassion.
- Do not be easily offended. Do not take the bait when reprobate minds attempt to draw you in. Do not cast your pearls to swine.
- Guard yourself against the spirit of racism.
- Make up in your mind who you will serve.
- Examine the fruit. Discern the root.
- Pray for those that hate their own race. THE HUMAN RACE.
- Remember whatever God made, Satan attempts to destroy and divide.
We must begin to understand and discern who is really behind demonic spirits – our actions and behavior. Make up in your mind whom you will love and follow. Choose love over hate. When you engage with someone, begin to discern the spirit behind their actions. The answer to racism is not found in legislation or politics. It is a heart problem. It is pride, hatred, arrogance, & prejudice.
Examine your fruit. Are you sowing the seeds of racism or prejudgement? It is not too late to repent and turn away from it. Seek God while He may yet be found. Racism needs to be acknowledged, discussed, cast out and bound – just like any other demonic spirit. The Gospel saves. Jesus Christ saves!
Break the chains!